when you try falling in love again ....
You’re mourning the loss of what could have been. You’re mourning the fact that, at least for a little while, you thought you had found your person. You felt so happy and filled up and peaceful and you thought, this is it. This is what everyone was talking about.
You had someone to come home to at night. Someone to think about when the days were long and you were nervous about your job or your future or your amily troubles. This person didn’t get rid of your problems for you. But they helped you deal with them. They were like an energy around you – difficulties could still creep through the shield, but they were less terrifying when you knew you had someone by your side.
And then in an instant, that all evaporated. Whether it was your choice or theirs or a mutual decision, it stings and consumes you and convinces you that this is all you’ll ever be able to think about for the rest of your life. This is your story – a happiness and then a breakup and then a never-ending bout of loneliness and depression that you’ll never get away from.
you go on runs and you show up at happy hours and birthday parties and maybe you even go on a few dates. You try to smile, and to let out breaths of “satisfaction,” and to do anything else you’ve seen on a screen that supposedly signifies that you are now okay.
But none of it works. And you’re still disheartened
I will lying to say I’m all better now! moment because those don’t exist in real life. We don’t heal in one perfect scene, on the top of a hill overlooking a city skyline.( well it does make you feel better a bit)
We heal in little moments that we don’t even notice. One night, you fall asleep without dwelling on the fact that you didn’t say good night to them. You don’t even realize this happened, But still, there will be night happened. The one where you just fell asleep without any sadness or dwelling. soon. And eventually, at some point, the “normal” nights will outweigh the sadness nights.
You will put yourself back together in bits and pieces. You will learn to enjoy your hobbies again. You will find new hobbies. You will watch the old shows you two used to watch together, you will watch new shows
Little by little, you will be okay. But that’s why heartbreak is so hard – because it’s little by little. So little, in fact, that it often feels like you’re not making any progress. It feels like heartbreak is your fate and you might as well get used to it, because nothing is apparently changing.
Just as long as you don’t get caught up in the idea that it will be like this forever. Because it won’t. Things will change. You will begin to become happier. You just won’t notice the change happening.
And then, one day, And you’re going to laugh without feeling weird about it. The world is still moving. Your life is still happening. You’re okay. You will be okay. im sure....
( I have not given up ....l